Conscious Sex, Part One: Ain't No Condom for Bad Vibes

This article first posted at in March 2017.



So listen. If you’ve ever had sex, you know it’s pretty damn awesome.  And while some parts of sex can very well be all fun and games, there are aspects to sex that you should take very seriously.

No, I’m not talking about pregnancy and disease. Juices and cooties aren't the only things swapped when you're getting it in. I’m talking about energy. People love to say that they want “positive vibes only” but don’t realize where they’re picking up the exact opposite of that.

Sex is a merging and transference of energy, which means if you’re serious about only dealing with positive vibes, you better make sure that both you and your partner are about that life. If not, things might get a little too real, and fast!


Energy is contagious. Sex allows another person’s energy into your most intimate and powerful space and your energy into theirs. So, not only do you need to be aware of your partner’s energy, you need to be aware of your own as well. Just like if you were feeling not-so-fresh physically, if you aren’t feeling so great emotionally, don’t pass that energy along to your partner. Let’s practice some conscious sexual responsibility.


The first step is to be aware of yourself. Take note of your moods from day to day and try to think through how or why you feel the way you do when you’re not feeling so “love and light”. When you have been intimate with a person, notice how you feel in the hours and days that pass. Notice if you feel inexplicably uncomfortable, sad, irritable, or guarded. If you weren’t feeling this way previously, this is probably a sign that the person you’ve engaged with has some funky things going on and you two should probably hold off on sex until they have some time to get it together. If you were feeling this way before and it seems to be the same or worse afterwards, both you might have some emotional things to clear up. If you feel light, energetic, safe, and genuinely happy after a rendezvous, that’s a good sign that both you and your partner are balanced and positive.


The next step is communication. If you are allowing a partner into your sacred space, you should feel comfortable enough to have a conversation about how each of you is feeling and what’s going on with you. If you’re in a mood or you’re feeling a way, say that and respect your partner enough not to put that energy on to them. They should extend the same courtesy to you. If not, then don’t be surprised when things don’t seem to “click” when you two are trying to get it started or when the both of you are sad, irritable, and generally in a pissy mood after a sexual experience.


Find yourself in a situation where you’re feeling the negativity? Whether it’s yours or your partners, you need to know how to clear it out. Start with clearing your physical space in the ways that feel natural to you. Then, learn to use the tools created for clearing your aura and specifically your womb space. Why the womb space? Because it is the portal through which you manifest things into the physical realm (The fact that you have a womb makes you an incredibly powerful creator, but you want to be sure you are using your powers for good.


Not only can you create babies, but you can create some bomb ass energy to manifest the desires of your (and your partner’s) heart…..or you can create bullshit. Just depends on what’s up in there) Yoni eggs are perfect for this (Talk to La Tetra about this. She knows things.) Then, once you feel like you have cleared the energy and you are back to a neutral space, it’s time to fill up that neutral space with positivity. Yoni eggs are great for this as well as waist beads (Again, talk to La Tetra to learn the things.) Two womb-having partners can both go through this process. If you have a womb and your partner has a penis, then you can explore other ways of processing emotions and clearing energy. All it takes is creativity and intention!

This was a lot of information all at once, so to wrap it all up in a super cute Aliwaza’s package, here’s a summary, in bullet form. You’re welcome.


How to be conscious AND sexually responsible:


  • Be aware of your own energy and have enough self-control and empathy not to pass that onto a partner. It’s not fair to either of you.


  • Establish strong communication with your partner so you both feel comfortable expressing your emotions and clearing up negativity together.


  • Be aware of your mental and emotional space before and after sex. If you know your vibe is funky, keep that shit to yourself. If your vibe was great before and funky after you been bumping and grinding, bae might need to get their spirit in order.


  • If you’re into casual sex, or if you’re a one-partner person, understand how to determine your own “stuff” from that of your partners and learn to clear out anything that is not yours.


  • Remember the importance of regularly clearing your womb space and filling it with positivity with tools and adornments like yoni eggs and waist beads. If your partner does not use these tools, then put some creativity behind your intention to clear out negativity and infuse positivity into the both of you.

Want to know more about conscious sexuality and manifestation? Check out Part Two of this post!